This word has been on my mind for the last few days. All my life, I've been looking ahead to the next stage or the next big event. When I was 5, I wished I was 10. When I was 10, I longed for 16. I dreamed about my wedding day since I started playing with Barbies (which was pretty young!). You get the point.
So, now that I've hit most of the milestones I always looked forward to, I find myself wondering "What next?". I got my driver's license. I graduated from high school. I turned 21. I graduated from college. I got married. We bought a house. It feels like the only thing left is to have babies, but that's not going to happen for a while (even though there are days I wish it would happen right now!).
I was recently telling Jordan that I'm feeling bored because I don't have "the next thing" to research on Google. First it was the wedding, then the house, then furniture for the house, and now... what? Even though I'm sure you could throw tons of ideas my way at this point, I find myself being reminded to be content where I am for a while. I can easily get consumed by the fun ideas of being a stay at home mom (which is my goal someday!), but for now, I work at a chiropractor's office and I have the freedom of a new marriage (a.k.a. no little ones to worry about!). I need to embrace this stage of life and stop dreaming ahead... which is very difficult for me to do.
I think ahead because I feel like I need to be prepared for what's to come. Worrying has been a part of my life for a while, but I'm starting to realize (thanks to the gentle prodding of my husband) that there's no point to it. There's already a plan that I don't know about... constructed by Someone who knows what I need a lot better than I do. Check this out:
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:25-34 (NIV)
What a relief. It's not up to me. I can be content today.
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